How I've learned to navigate my inner darkness on my way to self love
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Shifting in life can be somewhat intimidating when you’re first starting out. And for me, when I say “first starting out” I mean I’ve been on this focused and intentionally active journey of awakening to my highest purpose for more than a year now and it has only gotten MORE intense. And all this AFTER spending the better part of my first 38 years of life wandering aimlessly, seeking for my purpose in all places OUTSIDE of myself always knowing I was here to do grand and great things, just not quite sure exactly what or how.
To quickly clarify, what IS shifting? It is something we have been doing our entire lives as we become newer and hopefully better versions of ourselves. As we learn and grow, we shed the layers of our old selves who may have struggled to learn certain life lessons in order to advance along our soul’s journey of awakening and expansion. Through this shedding and subsequent gaining of knowledge and experiences, we naturally SHIFT in our knowing and perspective of ourselves and, in turn, the world.
My name is Rachelle Richard and this is my shifting and learning journey through my soul’s awakening and ascension. I share my story so to document and perhaps inspire along the way. As I reclaim the power in my life, I seek to be a light to guide the way for you to do the same. I embrace the understanding that life was never intended to be a struggle and filled with so much darkness yet we are the ones who perpetuate it. This is something we CAN change and we must….for the sake of all humanity.
I’m in no way attempting or seeking to scare you. In fact, fear is itself nothing more than an illusion created under another illusion that it is serving us by protecting us and keeping us “safe” or used as a tool to keep us under yet even another illusion of control.
Here’s the real of it…. in order for our lives to change we must be the ones to truly change which means WALKING THROUGH THE INVISIBLE BOUNDARIES OF FEAR, shifting our understanding and owning that the only person you can and will ever have power over is YOU.
So as I have been constantly and consistently working on myself, I have discovered that existing in a space of clear uncertainty can allow for the darkness to creep in – negative thoughts and emotions that are fed by the hidden beliefs running in the background such as feeling not enough or just downright unworthy. This is when we must consciously make the choice and take the action to focus on that which we desire rather than that which we already have or do not want.
And on a day like today when I feel SO out of alignment and can’t seem to get a grip on my focus, instead of crawling into myself to hide, I sit to write it out as I seek to show myself I AM in the midst a shift and still very in alignment with ME.
And then I hear myself ask, WHO AM I?
As I have hated my life and spent most of it loathing who I THOUGHT I was, I now ask myself how can I hate that which I truly do not know? Which also then brings the question of how can we LOVE that which we truly do not know?
Do you KNOW who you are? Really?? TRULY??? All the amazing gifts and talents you are imbued with? I most certainly have discovered this to be a core root of disconnect within myself. Seeing why I have spent nearly my entire life so focused on pleasing all others before myself…programmed and thus adopting the beliefs that I am to put all other’s needs, wants and desires before my own. I can’t help but hear the song lyrics playing in my head, “You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.”
It was incredible how in the very beginning of this journey of spiritual awakening, I would fall even further out of alignment as I became a “victim” so easily to the negative beliefs in my head that I was so sure I was working through. Or even looking throughout my life of all the times I went against the unpleasant sensations in my gut as I would ignore my intuition to take the advice of others as though they knew better my vision, my purpose, ME than I. No doubt, two of the quickest ways to get out of alignment!
How can you tell you are out of alignment? By the results, of course! You are either creating more lack from a place of resistance and disconnect or embracing and receiving in the flow of abundance. Believe me for I know this roller coaster quite well! It’s that wonderful journey of AWAKENING to that which you truly are. Become the observer in your life, the one who is here to learn and overcome all limitations that have been created by humanity and then you’ll understand more of what is happening FOR you in your life.
As we let go of the thoughts and belief systems that keep us limited, small and feeling powerless, we also shed the layers of ourselves that sabotage us with debilitating fear from having faith in the divinity that we each are and the very root of the gift of FREE WILL – the divine gift of being imbued with the power to literally CREATE OUR WORLD.
In my increasing awareness, I have come to learn that there is the rabbit to the rabbit, the shadow within the shadow.
Meaning the second “rabbit” or cluster of negatively inspired beliefs that has its own hole of darkness and waits in the shadows for when we do not follow the original “rabbit of negative beliefs” down its original hole. Instead, the second rabbit seeks to cause guilt and other such debilitating states of being for even entertaining the thought of the first “rabbit”. So, often then, instead of following the first negative vibration, you follow the second and find yourself STILL being at the mercy of your victimized ego that claims the world happens TO them and that we are powerless to stop it.
Instead, we have ALL THE POWER. By acknowledging where in the process our power lies – change our thoughts and we change our world – we can LITERALLY do anything we put our minds to and already are whether you consciously realize it or not. Well, you should now, if you didn’t before! Same with the shifting that happens when you CHOOSE to be in charge of YOU! Oh, the places you can and will go!
To assist with maintaining strength and belief in myself on those days when the shadows seem so much darker through the shifting, I have begun to create lists in my journals of all the amazing things I am and have accomplished and overcome so to constantly remind myself of how powerful and divine I truly am! That is how I KNOW we can choose to simply LET GO of the negative because the more I FOCUS intentionally on the positive, I LITERALLY FEEL better!!
In seeking to create the life we desire, it is also becoming that version of ourselves which has that desire down the road along our timeline. I know, I know, it can be so discouraging….or is that just what your OLD version keeps saying?? I sure can see mine keeps telling me that! Yet all I want is to fulfill my soul’s purpose…it’s all I’ve ever wanted. But WHAT is that purpose EXACTLY? How do you stay true to you and keep connected to your vision when it seems all hell is breaking loose through your journey of ascension?
That’s right. Take a break RIGHT NOW. Ask yourself, what IS in this very moment? If you can say that you have a roof over your head, food in your belly, cool air blowing from the ventilation system as asphalt burns outside then YOU, love, are VERY blessed! ABUNDANTLY blessed to be exact!!
Acknowledgement of what we DO have is the best way to come into your own self and into the moment. Expressing gratitude for that which you are clearly blessed with is the most aligned way to attract more divine abundance into your life!
I am so very grateful for you choosing to share some of your precious time with me! Thank you for reading about and SHARING in my journey.
Infinite Love and Light to you,